This post’s title is misleading and that is exactly why I chose it. This is not going to have anything to do with anthropomorphized enterprises getting into bed with each other (although that does sound like a lot of fun as well). But rather, this post is about my feelings at this moment where I’m in between jobs. It would be disingenuous to this blog, my readers - most of whom are (ex-) colleagues -, and to myself not to address my recent departure from my previous employer in some form.

I’ve been with this company for three years and eight months. A lot of things happen during such an amount of time and it has definitely left some marks on me. I learned a lot, be it about technology, myself, or office politics. I also had the pleasure to meet a whole lot of cool and interesting people from different backgrounds and cultures. Finally, I also leave behind the things I have been continuously working on for several years. Things I created, maintained, and helped shape. There are definitely many aspects I am going to miss. On the other hand, I have to admit that it is immensely freeing to be in the position to cut some ties. Just having the option to switch to something new, back in that moment I felt a sense of agency I can hardly describe.

Interestingly, three-and-a-half’ish years is also about the same time span I worked in the first job I had after uni, the one right before this one. A somewhat obvious question to arise here is therefore whether I should worry about an emerging pattern. Frankly, in both instances I have actively been starting to look for new positions. That means in each case the underlying reason can be clearly attributed to some sort of dissatisfaction. Am I growing dissatisfied after 3.5 years, is that it? I find it somewhat hard to imagine that anything I don’t actively put my focus on would go on over a time horizon this large. Then again, I have no clue how emotional account keeping works.

What I do know, however, is that not all factors of dissatisfaction are created equal. I would say the reasons behind me leaving my first job vs. my second one were quite different overall. If I wanted to phrase it poignantly, maybe I would say that in the first job I saw too much perspective whereas in the second I eventually saw too little. I.e. in the first job I was given the impression I could do anything, anywhere. I was the rock star junior dev in my team, and that might have gone to my head. “So why would I keep doing it here?” my younger, over-privileged me thought. Now, with the job I just left, I rather ended up not seeing any more potential for where I could go next to grow. That’s why, in my head, I had to try to find my luck elsewhere. And by the way, that is still what I am out for! Finding luck, i.e. a place where I can feel happy at for a long time.

I do not find the process of changing jobs enjoyable at all. It’s probably also not getting better any time soon in the current economic and global political climate and AI coming after all of us. And I think I have to consider myself very lucky landing my next job with the amount of effort and time investment I spent. Without checking the details, I believe what it took was roughly 2-3 months, sending out somewhere in the ballpark of 15 or so applications. I only got into the interview stage with two of the companies I applied to, though, one of which made me the offer I ended up accepting. Not a slam dunk, and far from a pleasant experience. The amounts of time I innocently pulled up my phone randomly to look at god-knows-what, seeing an email notification and then getting hit by a rejection mail out of the blue were just brutal. But I was also still far from hundreds of monthly applications with no response at all as I sometimes hear about.

Leaving my previous safe haven by resigning from my job was taking on a risk. New probation period, new and unfamiliar working environment, new routines to adapt to because of a different commute. But I am hopeful it will pay out. I get to see what others have been working on and get to learn new ways of doing things. On the other side, I will try to bring in my skills as best I can to prove myself and pull more than my own weight. I will meet new colleagues which will show me their unique perspectives and I hope to be able to contribute some of mine. And I will have new pathways open up to me which will shape my way going forward. It is quite exciting if I’m being honest.